President Obama is coming to our valley! Other good news is that our congressman, Tim Ryan has been appointed to the Defense committee. The Defense committee holds the purse strings for the nation’s military. The Teabaggers have been busy calling the local radio talk shows with their comments on these two issues.
They offer a two-word answer why these two things have happened. The answer, Jim Traficant. They say, the president is visiting to show he backs Tim Ryan in the November election. Traficant has filed as an independent to run against Ryan. Teabaggers claim Ryan is so afraid of Traficant winning he has brought in no less than the president for support. The “baggers” claim Rep. Ryan was put on the Defense committee to show Ryan has clout. Being on such a committee might mean jobs for our area. The Teabaggers just see it as a way to keep Traficant from being elected. Of course these Teabagger comments are B.S. since Traficant is a joke. The sad part is that his supporters don’t realize they are part of the joke.
You’ve heard area talk show callers attack Ryan for years now. Their favorite line is, Ryan has his nose up Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi’s ass. These comments come from would be macho men who prefer to have women at home baking cookies. The same callers have never claimed that former Youngstown Mayor McKelvey had his nose up President Bushes ass. They never said former “CONgressman” Traficant had his nose up Speaker of the House Denny Hastert’s ass.
The local Tea Party talks about wanting a government that is answerable to the people. They then talk about supporting convicts like Traficant for office. Don’t they get that acts like that show they have no credibility. Not to mention that they had no problem with President GW Bush running up our debt for eight years.
Is Jim Traficant the answer to our problems or the root of our problems? I had a bad week and I am going to used the name Jim Traficant as my answer for it. I had a squirrel come down my chimney and run around my house. He now seems to be in the basement where I have placed a trap. Why did the squirrel come in my house? I’ll go with the teabagger’s answer to that. It’s because of Jim Traficant. The squirrel was looking for a big nut and thought he was at Traficant’s house.
While parked in our driveway a huge tree branch fell on Mrs. Elecpencil’s beloved Ford Taurus. It broke out the back window, dented the roof and quarter panel. Why did the branch fall? The answer is Traficant. Hundreds of squirrels were on the branch fighting and it fell from their weight. How is that Traficant’s fault? The squirrel were fighting over a nest that resembled Jimbo’s toupee.
Heard about the BP Gulf oil spill? It’s because of Traficant. Remember when Traficant would enter labor disputes? The ones where after Jimbos HELP, the workers always ended up taking more and more concessions. Jimbo threatened to lock everyone in a room and have everyone eat only beans until the negotiations were over. Well, rumor has it the other day Felon Jimbo was at a AYCE beans buffet. Soon after he passed gas blowing up the BP oil rig. Jimbo has plenty of hot air on a normal day let alone eating bottomless plates of beans.
Kids, the next time your parents ask you, who is responsible for some misdeed you did, answer Jim Traficant.
When Traficant is a featured speaker at a Tea party let’s call it what it really is, ” A Mad Hatter Tea Party.”
Mumford and Sons: Awake My Soul
Who is more foolish, the child afraid of the dark or the man afraid of the light? ~Maurice Freehill