In Stone Ridge, Texas Falon Griffin
began experiencing contractions
and was rushed to the hospital
by her husband, Robert Falon.
She cried out that the baby wouldn’t wait.
They then pulled over and went in a Chick-fil-A
and soon had their baby girl in the bathroom.
The restaurant informed them that they don’t deliver
so next time just come to the drive thru window.
Headlines for a big baby born at Burger King
would have been Whopper baby born at Burger King.
If the parents planned the birth at Burger King
they could say they wanted to have it their way.
If you had your baby at Taco Bell
instead of at a Burger King,
you would be thinking outside the bun.
Of course, a Taco Bell baby would have been born with a lot of gas.
Robert Falon stated to the local media that his wife
“Did something amazingly spectacular and should be congratulated.”
Robert is not very bright and doesn’t realize that women
have been giving birth to babies for centuries.
He did put Chick-fil-A on the spot with his comment.
So, because the baby girl named, Gracelyn
was born in a Chick-fil-A restaurant
she has awarded free Chick-fil-A for the rest of her life
and a guaranteed minimum wage job at age 14.
Their sandwich has 1400 grams of sodium, MSG, artificial colors
and Dimethylpolysiloxane, a silicone-based antifoaming agent
also found in products like Silly Putty and shampoo.
With a diet of these ingredients Gracelyn will never make 14.
Gracelyn won’t be able to eat at Chi k-fil-A on Sundays
as they are closed because they say it’s the Christian way.
Church’s are opened on Sunday and happy to take your money.
If Gracelyn had been born on a Sunday,
it would have been an udder nightmare as
she would have been born in the parking lot.
Chick-fil-A founder Truit Cathy died on a Monday.
He was not allowed to die on a Sunday
as it would have violated company policy.
The CEO of Chick-fil-A has made statements against homosexuals.
Former employees have said that Chik-fil-A is homophobic,
Islamaphobic, misogynist and bigoted.
Which qualifies them to be located next to Hobby Lobby.
It also means everyday is white Christian appreciation day
featuring all white meat from non-laying chickens
who refuse to submit to the unwanted sexual advances of Roosters.
Which means you’re really eating lesbian chickens.
That makes sense because the name, Chick-fil-A
sounds like the name of a lesbian nightclub.
Women have been kicked out of Chick-fil-A
for breast feeding because it wasn’t kosher.
At Gracelyn’s birth her dad had on a Trump 2020 T-shirt.
If Gracelyn turns out to be gay Chick-fil-A
will not hire her and dad will disown her.
Dad should have had Gracelyn turn down the food and a job
as conservatives believe in pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps.
Which makes as much sense as trying to pick up a chair
while you’re still sitting in it.
Having babies in fast food restaurants instead of hospitals
is Trump’s new healthcare plan to make America Great Again.
I was born in a hospital like most people.
I wouldn’t want free hospital food for life
but what about free healthcare for life?
I like books so I wish I had been born at Barnes and Nobel.
When Chick-fil-A founder Truit Cathy died
he was very shocked to learn
that god is a gay Islamic vegetarian woman
named Adala, which means, justice.
Don’t Chow Down at Chick-fil-A: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtGY9c6KKKY
“Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?”–Author Ernest J. Gaines