Latrine Nativity

In Stone Ridge, Texas Falon Griffin

began experiencing contractions

and was rushed to the hospital

by her husband, Robert Falon.

She cried out that the baby wouldn’t wait.

They then pulled over and went in a Chick-fil-A

and soon had their baby girl in the bathroom.

The restaurant informed them that they don’t deliver

so next time just come to the drive thru window.

Headlines for a big baby born at Burger King

would have been Whopper baby born at Burger King.

If the parents planned the birth at Burger King

they could say they wanted to have it their way.

If you had your baby at Taco Bell

instead of at a Burger King,

you would be thinking outside the bun.

Of course, a Taco Bell baby would have been born with a lot of gas.

Robert Falon stated to the local media that his wife

“Did something amazingly spectacular and should be congratulated.”

Robert is not very bright and doesn’t realize that women

have been giving birth to babies for centuries.

He did put Chick-fil-A on the spot with his comment.

So, because the baby girl named, Gracelyn

was born in a Chick-fil-A restaurant

she has awarded free Chick-fil-A for the rest of her life

and a guaranteed minimum wage job at age 14.

Their sandwich has 1400 grams of sodium, MSG, artificial colors

and Dimethylpolysiloxane, a silicone-based antifoaming agent

also found in products like Silly Putty and shampoo.

With a diet of these ingredients Gracelyn will never make 14.

Gracelyn won’t be able to eat at Chi k-fil-A on Sundays

as they are closed because they say it’s the Christian way.

Church’s are opened on Sunday and happy to take your money.

If Gracelyn had been born on a Sunday,

it would have been an udder nightmare as

she would have been born in the parking lot.

Chick-fil-A founder Truit Cathy died on a Monday.

He was not allowed to die on a Sunday

as it would have violated company policy.

The CEO of Chick-fil-A has made statements against homosexuals.

Former employees have said that Chik-fil-A is homophobic,

Islamaphobic, misogynist and bigoted.

Which qualifies them to be located next to Hobby Lobby.

It also means everyday is white Christian appreciation day

featuring all white meat from non-laying chickens

who refuse to submit to the unwanted sexual advances of Roosters.

Which means you’re really eating lesbian chickens.

That makes sense because the name, Chick-fil-A

sounds like the name of a lesbian nightclub.

 Women have been kicked out of Chick-fil-A

for breast feeding because it wasn’t kosher.

At Gracelyn’s birth her dad had on a Trump 2020 T-shirt.

 If Gracelyn turns out to be gay Chick-fil-A

will not hire her and dad will disown her.

Dad should have had Gracelyn turn down the food and a job

as conservatives believe in pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps.

Which makes as much sense as trying to pick up a chair

while you’re still sitting in it.

Having babies in fast food restaurants instead of hospitals

is Trump’s new healthcare plan to make America Great Again.

 I was born in a hospital like most people.

I wouldn’t want free hospital food for life

but what about free healthcare for life?

I like books so I wish I had been born at Barnes and Nobel.

 When Chick-fil-A founder Truit Cathy died

 he was very shocked to learn

that god is a gay Islamic vegetarian woman

named Adala, which means, justice.


Don’t Chow Down at Chick-fil-A: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtGY9c6KKKY

“Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?”–Author Ernest J. Gaines

 

 

 

 

 

2 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

2 responses to “Latrine Nativity

  1. james jordan

    Thanks, you made some good points.

  2. Anonymous

    Thanks JJ.

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