Monthly Archives: December 2019

Being  Thankful for Smart Men not Smart Phones  

I love my TV, stereo and other convenient electronics.

But I’m glad these things weren’t invented 200 years ago.

The USA would never have had the Boston Tea Party

if TV had been invented in our nation’s early history.

Those fake Indians wouldn’t have been at the docks

if the Celtics or Bruins were on TV that same evening.

Founding Fathers Thomas Jefferson and John Adams

would have contributed nothing to this nation,

if they would have had access to a TV in their day.

They would have sat competing against each other

every night watching Jeopardy with host Sir Alex Trebek.

They’d of probably also loved the History Channel.

If George Washington had a 60” TV with surround sound,

he would have reclined in his leather Lazy Boy

warmly indoors at Mount Vernon drinking cappuccino

with Martha, binge watching Netflix’s “House of Cards.”

George and Martha would have shaken their white wigs

wondering why anyone would want to get involved in politics.

Which means he wouldn’t have been at Valley Forge,

on that 1777 record cold snowy December winter

in a tent with colonial troops freezing to death.

Which means today we’d still be owned by England

and be speaking English (ha, ha) and be eating kidney pie.

Founding Father, Ben Franklin is credited with drafting

The Declaration of Independence and the Constitution.

He created the first political cartoon and wrote many books.

He also discovered electricity and made lightning rods,

invented bifocals, swim fins, the odometer and the flexible catheter.

He also sadly, gave us the concept of Daylight Savings Time.

It sounds like a ton of accomplishments in one lifetime.

If he’d of had a telephone he wouldn’t have accomplished

a fraction of these things that benefited our country.

He’d of had the phone ringing off the hook in his print shop

being pestered by French girlfriends and telemarketers.

I do  imagine that Ben would have loved watching “Star Trek.”

Not to leave women out of our nation’s founding,

I want to note that Abigail Adams was very influential

in the decision making of our second president, John Adams.

If John would have had a computer he might have gotten

on eHarmony or Match.com and married someone else.

That means John and Abigail wouldn’t have created

John Quincy Adams our nation’s sixth president.

John Quincy oversaw the purchase of Florida from Spain.

In 2000 the hanging chad election in Florida

ended up giving us GW Bush for our 43rd president.

Which makes me wish John Adams had found a wife

on “Go Fish” or some other computer dating site.

For the most part we are lucky our Founding Fathers

did not have the distraction of our modern electronics.

They got off their asses and accomplished historic changes

that made our nation the great country it is today.

The very least we can do today is to turn off our electronic devices

one day a year and get up off our keisters and go and vote.

 

The Voting Song: “You Got to Vote”

“Nobody will ever deprive the American people of the right to vote except the American people themselves and the only way they could do this is by not voting.” ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

 

 

 

 

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